Dear advertisers

Unbelievable and unimaginable: they do not mean what you think they mean.

If you tell me an offer is unbelievable then I will believe you - you are lying about the offer, so thank you for making me aware of that fact.

If you tell me something is unimaginable you are obviously a moron. You have just made a statement about the thing therefore you have imagined it.

And, while we're at it, something cannot be both new and improved.

Painting progress

When I first moved into this house I painted it one wall at a time, one evening at a time. It's the same again now, and I've just done the first coat on the stairs. Second coat tomorrow evening, then it's the hall, then the skirting and banisters (that should be hours of fun). Then moving loads of stuff. Then bed 3. Then moving more stuff. Then bed 1. Drop dead date of 8th April when the carpet people arrive. The landing and stairs do look very different already, though, with the much lighter colour.

Also, I have several boxsets to go through of old TV shows so I'm putting DVDs on the laptop while I paint. Today was ep 1 of Crime Traveller (anyone remember that?).

Well I never

I just put in an order for groceries to be delivered. This is not unusual for me. What *is* unusual is that they're going to be delivered in 12 hours. So far I'm impressed. Let's see what actually turns up tomorrow morning, though, before I get really impressed.